Human Relations Principle #27 to Be a Leader

“Abilities wither under criticism;

they blossom under encouragement.”

~Dale Carnegie

Human Relations Principle #27: Praise the slightest improvement and praise every improvement. Be “hearty in your approbation and lavish in your praise.”

(“How to spur people on to success.”)

(This is the twenty-seventh in a series of articles where I will encapsulate each of Dale Carnegie’s timeless, life-changing principles for dealing with people. (Adapted from How to Win Friends and Influence People.))*

We all crave appreciation and recognition, and will do almost anything to get it. But nobody wants insincerity. Nobody wants flattery. When praise is specific, it comes across as sincere—not something the other person may be saying just to make one feel good.

If you and I will inspire the people with whom we come in contact to a realization of the hidden treasures they possess, we can do far more than change people. We can literally transform them.

What psychologists have discovered about praise, criticism, and human potential . . .

Use of praise instead of criticism is the basic concept of B.F. Skinner’s teachings. This great contemporary psychologist has shown by experiments with animals and with humans that when criticism is minimized and praise emphasized, the good things people do will be reinforced and the poorer things will atrophy for lack of attention.

The psychologist, Jess Lair, said, “Praise is like sunlight to the warm human spirit; we cannot flower and grow without it. And yet, while most of us are only too ready to apply to others the cold wind of criticism, we are somehow reluctant to give our fellow the warm sunshine of praise.”

William James said, “Compared with what we ought to be, we are only half awake. We are making use of only a small part of our physical and mental resources. Stating the thing broadly, the human individual thus lives far within his limits. He possesses powers of various sorts which he habitually fails to use.”

Yes, you who are reading these words possess powers of various sorts which you habitually fail to use; and one of these powers you are probably not using to the fullest extent is your magic ability to praise people and inspire them with a realization of their latent possibilities.

To be an effective leader who inspires others to greatness, praise the slightest improvement and praise every improvement. Be hearty in your approbation and lavish in your praise.

Much success and fulfillment with mastering human relations,

Ray

* The best guide on effective human relations that I have ever encountered is How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie, published in 1936. Prior to writing the book, Carnegie spent 20 years researching the habits of successful people. The book has sold over 30 million copies and is still listed on Amazon’s top 100 best selling books.

Other articles within this series you may enjoy:

3 Fundamental Techniques in Handling People

• Human Relations Principle #1: Don’t criticize, condemn or complain.
• Human Relations Principle #2: Give honest and sincere appreciation.
• Human Relations Principle #3: Arouse in the other person an eager want.

6 Ways to Make People Like You

• Human Relations Principle #4: Become genuinely interested in other people.
• Human Relations Principle #5: Smile.
• Human Relations Principle #6: Remember that a person’s name is to him or her the sweetest and most important sound in any language.
• Human Relations Principle #7: Be a good listener. Encourage others to talk about themselves.
• Human Relations Principle #8: Talk in terms of the other person’s interests.
• Human Relations Principle #9: Make the other person feel important—and do it sincerely.

12 Ways to Win People to Your Way of Thinking

• Human Relations Principle #10: The only way to get the best of an argument is to avoid it.
• Human Relations Principle #11: Show respect for the other person’s opinions. Never say, “You’re wrong.”
• Human Relations Principle #12: If your are wrong, admit it quickly and emphatically.
• Human Relations Principle #13: Begin in a friendly way.
• Human Relations Principle #14: Get the other person saying “yes, yes” immediately.
• Human Relations Principle #15: Let the other person do a great deal of the talking.
• Human Relations Principle #16: Let the other person feel that the idea is his or hers.
• Human Relations Principle #17: Try honestly to see things from the other person’s point of view.
• Human Relations Principle #18: Be sympathetic with the other person’s ideas and desires.
• Human Relations Principle #19: Appeal to the nobler motives.
• Human Relations Principle #20: Dramatize your ideas.
• Human Relations Principle #21: Throw down a challenge.

9 Ways to Be a Leader:

How to Change People Without Giving Offense or Arousing Resentment

• Human Relations Principle #22: Begin with praise and honest appreciation.
• Human Relations Principle #23: Call attention to people’s mistakes indirectly.
• Human Relations Principle #24: Talk about your own mistakes before criticizing the other person.
• Human Relations Principle #25: Ask questions instead of giving direct orders.
• Human Relations Principle #26: Let the other person save face.